A slow thaw

the stones still cold

in the midday sun [Lorraine] 

In spring a young man’s fancy may turn to love, but this not-bad-for-an-old broad longs for farm fresh greens. Beautiful days, all bright light, glowing color and bird song make hope flare: This is it! Spring is here! But, no. Winter hangs on, all pushy bluster and chill spit, slapping down daffies and tulips with long cold fingers, smacking bud stippled branches off trees, biting through my wishful-thinking fleece with forty-five degree F-in teeth— Yow! It’s Mud, the north country’s fifth season, a time of fits and starts, of falling backs and bursting forths. Even through a dusting of snow, green pushes up up up, baby leaves unfurl, fruit tree buds blossom— Ta da!

I change into my winter coat. It’ll be even chillier forty minutes away at Essex Farm (the CSA we're members of), with its wide brown fields and drafty open trailers housing the week’s food distribution. I drive, window rolled open, cold rushing my face and roaring in my ears, no radio, wondering which veggie I won’t see this week. Root cellar staples get us through the dormant season: potatoes, carrots, beets and celery root; squashes, cabbage, kohlrabi, and onions.  As winter deepens, first the squashes run out, then the leeks and garlic, then the kale. If there’s no red cabbage this week, that’s it for fresh slaw. Until summer. I feel a pang of loss. But soon, very soon, there will be tender spring greens. Ah, anticipation! 

The best part of belonging to a CSA farm is the excitement and deep pleasure of eating in season, each vegetable in its own time. Oh, the grief when a favorite is done! Oh, the impatience waiting for the next. Oh, the joy of a new arrival! The creative making do with what’s on hand, of cooking without a recipe and without the grocery store.  The awareness, always, of time passing while rolling forward, season after season. Of accepting that life died to fuel mine, and accepting too that my turn will come to return the favor…. Awe for nature, vast and beautiful and terrible….  Stepping into the veggie trailer, I see—  fresh greens! O happy day! Sorrel, young dandelion greens, and chives!  Next week: asparagus!

Late-teens up

early after a late night scatter

to first jobs…

 

What is a haibun?

PHOTO CREDIT: Jasmine&Roses