Daniela V Gitlin

View Original

Write (Or Anything Your Heart Desires) Reliably Without Stress! Read Now! And Receive A Bonus Baker’s Dozen Writing Tips!

Doodle Quote“You’re so busy! How do you do it?” I’m asked, not infrequently, about my writing process.

“With difficulty,” I usually quip. But, it got me thinking. How do I do it?  

It’s simple really, but not obvious.

It’s all about identifying your Modus Operandi (M.O.), your fundamental operating assumption(s).

By definition, we don’t question assumptions. Until…. 

One day, I noticed— very important, the act of noticing— that when I’m writing regularly, I am happy.

Yet— I also noticed— that I wrote only after taking the garbage out, at the end of the day when I was tired, or on edge that Son would interrupt my train of thought to ask for a ride. What’s up with that? I asked my self.

A-ha!  I wrote last, and then only with the dregs of the day’s energy. No energy left, no writing.  Sound familiar?

There it was, my self-defeating M.O., naked in the light of awareness. In a flash, I got it, and— Ciao baby!— committed to the new M.O.: 

Only I am responsible for my health and happiness. Writing is essential to my health and happiness. Therefore I must write, every day, as the priority. 

And the corollary: It isn’t necessary to write perfectly. Or even well. Only, to write.   

Our fundamental operating assumptions DRIVE THE WAY we ask and answer questions, solve problems and take action.

Why is it important to know your M.O.? Because it is your DEFAULT attitude, philosophy and way of life. You operate out of it automatically and without thinking. You can infer it by studying what you are actually doing (as opposed to saying).

Your M.O. is incredibly powerful, whether you’re conscious of it, or not. Either it drives you or your drive it. Wake up to it and it’s yours to use as you see fit.

Grasp your M.O., and wield it like a sword. Slice away stress from your psyche (and writing process) with one clean cut. 

When you work against your self and your defaults, you stress. Stress drains you of scads of vital life energy. Which even sleep will not recoup.

Work with yourself, and whatever it is you’re doing becomes effortless. And a pleasure. Where’s the stress? Gone. What are you going to do with all that free energy? Write with it! 

SHIFT YOUR M.O. AND THE SOLUTION TO A PREVIOUSLY UNSOLVABLE PROBLEM WILL COME TO YOU.  It’s uncanny.

I write best, first thing in the morning, before work clutters up my mind, when I am alone in the house. Hell..oh…. Isn’t that when I should be writing?!! Duh.

So that’s what I do: After Hubby and Son leave for their day, I write from 8:30 to 10 a.m. Then I exercise, and go to work. Same on weekends, I just don’t go to work.

Simple. Effortless. Why? Because it goes with my M.O., not against it. 

You may say: Well, I don’t have the luxury of changing my work schedule. Here’s the thing. Before I shifted my M.O., that’s what I thought too.  After I committed to daily writing, I couldn’t believe the solution hadn’t occurred to me before. 

It had always been there. But (for years) I didn’t listen when I grumbled to myself: I wish I didn’t have to work in the morning so I could write when I’m alone in the house. Because my old M.O. didn’t take me seriously. My new M.O. does.

In summary, here’s how to write reliably without stress in the obstacle course of life:

We all have constraints within which we live. CLARIFY WHAT MATTERS MOST TO YOU. MAKE UP YOUR MIND TO HONOR THAT— the key that opens all doors— and THE WAY AROUND THOSE CONSTRAINTS WILL PRESENT ITSELF.

THIS IS A GENERAL PRINCIPLE. IT’LL WORK WITH ANYTHING, not just writing. 

"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it!" ~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Tips Based On How The Brain Works: 

1.  Create a writing habit. Write, at the same time, every day, for a fixed time period. Forming a habit, like breaking a habit, requires daily practice. It takes approximately three months to lay down that neural track. 90 meetings (writing sessions) in 90 days. Doing just this yields amazing results:

  • It may not sound like much, but writing an hour and a half every day builds up over time to a respectable amount of writing.
  • The more I write, the more I write. Once in the flow, I’ll write every chance I get. My dedicated writing time has evolved into my minimum writing time.
  • Parking my tush at 8:30 reliably opens the tap. My writing self knows that time is dedicated for her. She counts on it and uses it. 

2.  The mind can only do one thing at a time. Either you write or, wait to write. Write or, worry about not writing. Write or…. You get the idea.

3.  Exercise. For two reasons. One, it brings blood to your brain, feeding it and removing waste, which keeps it healthy. The healthier your brain, the more mentally agile it will be, the more ideas will come to you, and the more you’ll write. Two, it gets you off your duff, which tends to spread with the sitting that goes with writing.

4.  Maintain a healthy lifestyle. A sick and tired brain does the bare minimum. Breathing comes first. Priorities. Treat it kindly so you can breathe and write, both.  Eat right, sleep regularly, exercise, get your finances under control, get rid of unsupportive people, and disdain toxins: alcohol, recreational drugs, nicotine, sugar, artificial sweeteners, and junk food. If you have medical problems, take care of them.

Tips Based On Psychology:

5.  Create accountability. Box yourself in. For example, I’m a person of my word.  I told you in my About page that I post once a week. If I don’t deliver, I won’t have kept my word, I’ll have let you down, and I’ll be disgusted with myself. I’d rather struggle with producing the post on time. Find your box.

6.  Build continuity, interest, and excitement, while lowering anxiety. Write with a defined end point. It is a phenomenon of therapy that patients spend forty minutes of the session circling, then drop a bomb five minutes before it ends. Closing on a cliff-hanger bites, but the next session starts off with a bang. It’s the same with writing. Five minutes before your writing session ends— Wham! The Muse hits you with a hottie. If you have the time, write on! If you don’t, the agony of ripping yourself away is offset by the ecstasy of knowing how you’ll start the next session.

7.  Lower your standards. Writing junk is better than not writing the world’s next epic blockbuster. The point is not your opinion of your writing, but writing.

8.  Unlike real life, you have control over writing. You are in charge. Not your feelings. You. Remember Murphy’s Law: whatever can go wrong, will. It’s not personal. Getting stuck is part of the process. It is a problem to be solved, nothing more. Not a sign of failure. Keep writing.

Craft Tips:

9.   Writing for the long haul is not about content, but about craft. The content is the excuse to practice your craft and play with your medium, language.  Write because the process interests you, for it’s own sake. Not for money, fame, or to prove yourself, etc. Technique matters. Learn, learn, learn. Print, blogland, there is so much great stuff out there to learn from.

10.  Read a lot. Study closely the authors who keep your interest. Why are you compelled to keep reading?

11.  Writing is a practice and a process.

  • Notice AND capture that elusive idea immediately. Or it’ll be gone. Always keep pen and paper (or electronic gizmo, whatever) handy.
  • Think about it. Happily, you can think anytime, anywhere, while doing other things. Jot this stuff down too.
  • Write your first draft quickly, whether the words drop one by one, or gush out in a torrent. Suspend all judgment, censorship and opinion. Ruthlessly ignore your ego.
  • Revise. Revise. Revise. Bring all your skills to bear on crafting the raw material into a whole and beautiful thing that will stand alone without you. Ruthlessly ignore your ego.

12.  Don’t cling to anything you write. Take the attitude: easy come, easy go. The hard part of writing is choosing what to use from the infinity in your head, and around you. That brilliant line you want to recycle? Try, but if it doesn’t work…. Oh, well. You will write more brilliant lines. And have more brilliant ideas. Trust that.

Beyond Craft: Writing Is A Gift To Your Readers

13.  Readers are busy. Make it worth their while to read you. Or they won’t!  Doesn’t this contradict #9 above? Not really. You practice craft for yourself, but publish for the reader. Ideally, the writing is so good, you, the author, disappear, leaving the reader alone to enjoy your gift.  

PHOTO CREDIT: Hoola Tallulah