WHAT?

  

Welcome! What's this human’s life like? Just like yours: too much to handle gracefully. Here you’ll find writing on the epic theme: What now? I post weekly-ish. Except when I don’t.

More...

WANT MORE?

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

UNBELIEVABLE PRODUCTS!
Powered by Squarespace
« Ode to Reading And Six Book Reviews | Main | Pauses »
Thursday
Jun202013

Dear ShrinkU

For Debbie: This is her fault. 

Want balanced advice from ShrinkU?  Too bad. You get lame jokes only. 

*** 

Dear ShrinkU, I woke up blue this morning. What should I do? Yours bluely

Dear Blue,  Shower. 

***

Dear ShrinkU,  I’m always right and yet, a colleague calls me "The Claw.” What’s wrong with him? Wronged 

Dear Wrong Question,  Consult a vet. Declawing is affordable.   

*** 

Dear ShrinkU,  This North Country weather makes me crazy. Cold yesterday, warm today. What next? South of the Border

Dear SOB, The weatherman says: Hot tamale.

***

Dear ShrinkU,  Every time I have a guest over, my poodle humps her Pooh bear. I’m so embarrassed. How do I stop them?  Blushing

Dear Blush,  Tell them to take it to the bedroom. Unless that’s where you’re entertaining. 

***

Dear ShrinkU,  What do belly dancers and roller derby dames have in common? Richard 

Dear Dick,  Estrogen. You’re welcome. 

***

Dear ShrinkU,  I used to be round-shouldered and organized. Exercise straightened the slump, but now I'm all discombobulated. What the—?

Dear What The,  You’re bent out of shape. 

***

Dear ShrinkU,  Here’s a toughie for you. I’ve lost 200 pounds. How did I do it? Weight Of World Off

Dear WOW,  Easy. You got a divorce. 

*** 

Admit it, you want to know how low we'll go. Send us a Dear ShrinkU via the Comment link below. When the groaners pile up like a multi-car crash, we’ll post them. 

ShrinkU:  Visit our campus in Wry, corner of Ham and Cheese.

PrintView Printer Friendly Version

EmailEmail Article to Friend

Reader Comments (1)

Groooooan!

June 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.

My response is on my own website »
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>